Word of the Year

In my previous post, I didn't really mention goals or "resolutions".  I typically don't do them...no need.  It's not that I don't think I won't complete them (because there is a chance I won't) or don't think they are worthwhile...i just like to focus on my life as a whole.  Not in year by year changes.

I have a word for the year...

Intentional.

I plan to live intentionally.  In everything I do.  Time with the kids?  Make it intentional.  Time at work? INTENTIONAL (aka...no facebook).  If I spend the time I have doing the things I should be doing at that moment, the stress of all the other stuff won't seep in and make me crazy.  I won't think about those emails and projects during my sweet time with the kids because I did all I could during my work time...and vice versa.

Living intentionally will hopefully be in all things.  My health?  Intentional.  I need to get back to my post half-marathon bod (not because I care about what size clothes I wear, I care how I FEEL about myself).  My faith?  Intentional.  Find a women's group.  I haven't done this because honestly, I miss my girls from WECC in Nashville.  I bore my heart and soul, we spent many years creating these bonds and I just haven't felt ready to jump back in again with another group.  But I miss those connections and that time discussing faith, family and life.

So there it is.  That's my word.

Here goes 2015.

Bring it 2015

So writing on the blog isn't a common event anymore, but I won't miss my New Year's post.  

You can find past ones here (2011, 2012, 2013)


Going back and reading through the previous year's excitements leads me to believe one thing...I am an eternal optimist.  The new year never disappoints, our lives never disappoint and I always believe in the new and exciting.  Even better?  I'm never disappointed with the outcome either.  Whatever path we went down, was the one we were supposed to take no matter if it diverged from the original intention.

John coined this year "The Year of Bitter Disappointment" (coined right after the AU National title loss).  As an optimist, well, it just pissed me off.  Sure, some things didn't go our way and sometimes we felt like we took 5 steps back for every one we took forward but look where we are now.  We live at the BEACH.  Say that again.  WE LIVE AT THE BEACH.  WOW.

We started this year in a great place (despite the AU loss).  We started completely debt free, we sold our house, we started a new journey.  A journey to a place although we knew pretty well, we didn't know how we would fit in this little beach town.  To say we still pinch ourselves is an understatement.  We have met AMAZING people.  People that took us in immediately and said, "Hey. You're cool.  Let's be friends."  We have a full social calendar, we are outside a lot..we kayak, we paddleboard, we hike, we play on the beach, we swim, we bike, we walk...we LIVE and LAUGH a lot.


So what's on tap for this year?  We are building a home.  Not a house, but a home.  We have been waiting 10 years to be in a place we can call our own.  Our stamp on a place.  That is VERY exciting.

Anna will start Kindergarten (uhhh..HUH?  Impossible), Graham will start Pre-k (even more WHA??).  We will grow our businesses and we will love on our puppies for every extra day we get with them (Cooper is now 11 and Abbie 10).

Most of all we feel like we are where we are supposed to be.  THIS is our place.  We feel it in our bones.  We know something will happen that we didn't want.  We know something will happen that will surprise us.  But ultimately we know we can handle whatever we get.  So 2015, bring it on.

Conversation with Anna.

So for those that are close to us, you might have known that age 4 with Anna was a bit trying.  She was sweet, don't get my wrong, but girlie-girl might have been a bit difficult to deal with most of the year.  The transition was really hard on her after the move which came with some lack of structure...girl was not having it.

But the good news is, she has really turned a corner.  The words "I just want to help you clean," "yes ma'am and no ma'am" are regulars, helping brother, cleaning her room....just general sweet girl behavior has blessed our home over the past month.  I just adore spending time with her, talking, reading and just relishing this new Anna.

(trying to upload a video of anna!!)

A is almost ONE WHOLE HAND!

Dusting off the ol' blog today.

And for a very good reason.  Sweet Anna is going to be ONE WHOLE HAND!!!  5 years old!!

This little bug:

I want to remember every conversation, every moment.  I want her to realize how amazing she is, how smart she is and how loving and kind she can and will be.  She says she is ready for Kindergarten, just like that, ready to be a "grown-up"...and one day later she will declare she will never grow up.  Just like Peter Pan.

I long to shelter her from the world of commercials, short shorts, mean girls, awful news....I want her to remain in her made up land of princesses, castles, brave Brother Knights and pretend.  Her ability to make up a story is remarkable, even once captivating her class for a full 15 min with a story since she didn't remember her show and tell (even her teachers were enthralled).  

I used to be sad that neither of my kids look like me, but as she grows older I know she has a lot of me in her.  She hates to be tickled, when there is too much going on- she just wants to curl up and watch a movie or snuggle in tight, she loves cereal, she LOVES watermelon, she has big feet (new shoes are a size 1!), she gets nervous about new things but still excited to do them, and she loves fiercely and she LOVES warm hugs.

Her Pre-K teacher told me the other day that she hopes we can keep in touch because she just has to know what Anna chooses to do with her life.  What an amazing statement.  She said she is so personable, so loving towards her classmates, always including, always answering and asking questions, she just can't wait to see who she becomes.

We say the exact same thing.  Who will this amazing child become?  Until then, I just want her to be my sweet 5 year old Anna.

We have a lot of adventures ahead of us sweet girl.  You are driving these next adventures, you are leading us into uncharted parent/kid territories.  We KNOW it will be great.  We KNOW it will be hard some days but we are absolutely CERTAIN there will be a lot of love.

It's Captain Jack Sparrow to you.

So Graham continues his love for all things Pirates and insisted his 3rd birthday be a "Capt Jack Spaawoow" birthday.  Buddy Dude is THREE!!  3!!!  Unbelievable.  It's weird because some days it feels like he is so much older, it's like his year of two lasted more than just 365 days.

What else is Graham into?  Books! (typically the same one read in between a couple others...this week, "Don't Let the Pigeon Drive the Bus!").  He continues his love of Seaside and screams in delight when he finds out that is where we are headed.  SEASIDE!!!  He says, "I LOVE SEASIDE!!".  What an awful life, right?  He loves to make pirate swords out of anything and everything he finds (sticks, pens, erector sets, hairbrushes...etc).  He loves being at the beach and loves riding on the new bike attachment that goes on the back of my bike (like a half bike).  He LOVES the dogs probably a little too much and also enjoys torturing his sister every now and then too.  He is always looking for Anna if she isn't around and definitely chooses her as first priority playmate over anyone else.  He hates getting his finger nails trimmed, hair cut and wearing shoes.

And now that he is three, he insists on calling us "Mom" and "Dad" like he is some fancy pants teenager.  I tried to bring him back around to "Mommy" but he just won't do it.  Little buddy.

This next year is going to be awesome and you are just going to keep growing and getting more piratey!

STATS:  34lbs, 40in!  Wearing 4T tops and 2T bottoms, size 10/10.5 shoes!

Florida so far....

It was a rough start, I was missing friends, the kids were missing friends and our house, John was going back and forth to Nashville.....  People think just because you are at the beach, you should be immediately happy.  And well, you are, but there are some things you miss being in a new place.  Especially friends.

That rough start turned into something pretty great. We are lucky, we have been taken in by a community that loves new folks.  We meet new awesome people everyday, and everyone seems genuinely happy and wanting to be our friends!  This doesn't really happen in other places we've lived, or at least not as quickly.  And these people are pretty awesome.  The kids and I have been on playdates, beach dates, late night dinners with drinks on patios, lunches, church services and weekend fishing adventures.  John has been to happy hours, lunches and soon to be fishing expeditions.  Imagine when the kids start school and meet all those folks?!


So we are adjusting and it is getting better with every minute.  Here are a couple of Florida things I am learning...

1. There is sand everywhere.  And i'm not talking on the beach.  I'm talking bathtubs, floors, laundry room...

2. The cost of milk.  Goo.  Still can't get used to that one!

3. I might just love fishing from the beach.

4. We are so much more active here.  The tv is hardly on, instead we are outside, riding bikes, on walks, playing on the beach, mapping out state park adventures.

5. Going to the beach just doesn't get old.  And when we talk to friends who have been here for years, it still hasn't gotten old.  That. Is. Awesome.


This could be our greatest adventure yet.

A complicated contradiction.

I have been following Kelle Hampton's blog for many years now and sometimes she writes something so wonderful and so like me, that I have to share.  I swear she and I need to be friends.

Find her full post here.

"I cry when I stare at my sleeping kids--I can't believe they belong to me, and the quiet moments when I get to watch them breathe and contemplate their every smile, how they need me, how they've changed our lives--it overwhelms me.
I swear like a sailor and censor it all for this blog.
I believe in God, and communicating with him and connecting myself to his purpose is an important part of my life.
Sometimes, I question if God exists.
I believe strongly in owning your voice and making a meaningful impact in the world with what you have to offer.
I often feel vulnerable and unworthy of making an impact.
I am passionate about changing people's views on disabilities and making the world a more accepting place for marginalized individuals.
I read fashion magazines and stress out when my toe nail polish gets chippy.
I love classical music.
I love techno music.
I love ballet.
I love dirty dancing.
I care about the environment.
I use a lot of paper towel.
I respect Buddhist faith and Jewish faith and Muslim faith and Christianity.
I love my atheist friends.
I dream of living on a quiet prairie,watching my children run in fields of wildflowers,smiling in the hot sun.
I dream of living in the big city, hosting parties, visiting museums, hailing cabs to our next big adventure.
I want to help people, connect with people, make the sad feel loved.
I like to buy stuff.
I like to make stuff.
I like to give stuff away.
Sometimes I feel so pissed off, I could knock walls down with my anger.
Sometimes I feel so weak and weepy, I could crumble if you looked at me funny.
Sometimes I feel so strong, I'll say whatever I think and not give a shit whether anyone agrees or not.

But all the time, I am complicated--maybe even contradictory. "